a state of annoyance

a certain someone,

just when my annoyance towards you from last time has started to recede, you did it again.. must we report everything to you? be a little bit understanding la.. please! must we get your permission before we do things? there's a reason behind every action.. think about that first before getting all mad and annoyed..

and to my prodigious yet stupid brother,

we don't like the girl! we've been saying that since 6 years ago.. like we'll forget easily what she's done to you.. you're very stupid to think that we'll accept her again after all that. where the hell does your pride and ego as a man went to? you easily succumb to that woman. we don't like her and her family! not just us, our ENTIRE family, even your friends.

i'm starting to get tired of playing the part of a good girl..
maybe i should end it soon.

a melancholy occasion..

here's the list of people who wished me BIRTHDAY!

1. Ezrin
2. Faiek
3. Ajim
4. Ct
5. Diera
6. Biela
7. Leeka
8. Machi
9. Alya
10. Tessa
11. Nizam
12. Niena
13. Mama and Papa
14. Ezmin (Munchkin)
15. Hazwani
16. Iman
17. Sheera
18. Wan

surprisingly, nizam didn't forget my birthday.. but, in the end, dayah didn't wished me like she always did. for 2 years, she's been the first to wished me.. and i'm not gonna forgive her easily.. it's her panda's birthday! i'm seriously disappointed!

honestly, today doesn't feel like our birthday.. just like 2 years ago.. i woke up at 2 pm.. and continue to lay on the bed until 4 pm, reading and listening to songs.. then i slept again from 5.30 'till 6 with my cat~ then bathe, berbuka and i made my own cake. yup.. no one bought us a birthday cake..

my birthday cake consist of 3 scoops of vanilla ice cream, topped with nuttela chocolate paste with a stick of white chocolate and a small candle on top.. blew the candle and i ate it alone..

every year of my birthday, i always secretly hope that some one would surprise me with something.. i always surprises my family members when it's their birthday, but sadly, no one around me seems to share the same thought as i did.. that's what happens when everyone around you only thinks of practicality.. i always thought that when mama came home from work, she'll suprise me with something.. when that didn't happen, i shifted to papa. when that didn't happen as well, i said to myself "oh, this year is the same as the others then.." then, on the next year's birthday, the same thought will arise, and it will end the same way..

i wonder when will i get to celebrate my birthday without pretending to be happy when somebody wishes me and feel truly happy without having the feeling to cry on my own birthday..
it's been a long time since i have that kind of birthday..

oh well, at least he wished me..

it's that time of the year...

... and surprisingly i don't feel all that excited. maybe because the past 2 years of my birthday has been boring.. when you got parents that has tons of workloads that can equal the prime minister's, you're bound to spend your birthday alone.. until night time that is~ huhu! oh well, it's still my birthday~ and my eldest brother's, Iman. yup! we share the same birthday and we're not even twins! muahahaha!!

we went out to OU yesterday, as an early birthday celebration.. all four of us, except my papa.. because of work, and he doesn't like shopping mall.. and i finally got to buy BOOKS! there's this two books i've been dying to get.. and i finally got it today! The Element Encyclopedia of Birthdays and The Dream Dictionary From A-Z.. i want to get this other book called Baking Bible, but i figure out that after i've tried out some recipes from the other two recipe books i bought last time, THEN i'll buy this other one~

then we 'berbuka' at chilis~ and we feel damn bloated! :)
after that we went to the Curve.. to... get... a... treadmill!! yup!yup! finally an exercise machine! and finally i can exercise! since i can't go out for a jog alone and since all my friends already went to college, so i've been without exercise for a year and i'm getting fatter! i'm fat, but right now i FEEL fat! so, need to lose some weight before raya and before college! FUFUFUFU! bought it at Johnson's, and they will send it on saturday!! hurry up! hurry up!

got back home and found out that the toilet is clogged! damn it! i feel like puking when brushing my teeth due to the smell! hurry up and call the plumber! oh, and my papa bought 10 kg of sugar! i told my mama that we have a year supply of sugar.. every one's desperate for it! with all these stupid people hiding the sugars and all.. huh!

then, it's 12 midnight and so, the birthday wishes came flooding in~ kind of disappointed that dayah is not the first this year.. and haven't wish me yet.. i'll post the list from first to last of the people who wished me tomorrow~

my bed is calling me,
'till next time
hugs and kisses

a sudden impulse..

Tiffany & Co. keys collection. damn it! i seriously want one! you only have to look at it to know that it takes a fortune to get one of these.. huhu!

wiping my drools off the keyboard,
will hear from me soon

XD

it feels really good to tease him
it feels even better when he did the same
thou i usually feel uncomfortable with male
somehow i can pass that barrier when i'm with him

DGM: Party and Party

OHMYGOD!!! D.Gray-Man's latest 50 pages chapter after almost 5 months of wait is so, so, so cruel! and so frustrating! and so very confusing! HUHU! i wish katsura hoshino-sensei doesn't have to progress the story so fast.. i'd rather wait for the weekly chapter than having everything jumbled up in this one chapter...

it's just too much to take in one go.. whatever happens to comedy? cute? and what of continuation from kanda's story from few months ago?! and here i was expecting a continuation from the previous chapter, and all of a sudden~ it have this serious, tragic feel to the manga.. and my dearly beloved Tyki Mikk is getting even more cruel than ever! WAAAA!

kind of wish i hadn't read this chapter... oh, and yays.. the next chapter is coming in another 2 months! and it's not gonna be published weekly like how it used to be!! why! oh why! hoshino-sensei! how can you do this to us! your forever faithful readers!

maybe i should distract myself from DGM by continuing the long forgotten Darker than Black anime.. or maybe it's just as frustrating as it sounds? well, they got cute looking hero.. or maybe i should just go with Gintama instead..

went off to vegetate meself in the corner,
'till next time

it's to KILL for!

have you ever got this weird feeling that when you see that particular person, you felt that you have your whole life together with him in the future.. it's like an instinct that says 'one day, you'll be with him'...? OK! eww! i sound like a lovestruck girl! OMG! eww-eth! FYI, i'm not in love alright!

it's just a weird feeling i get whenever i see him.. it's like i felt i could neutralize everything that he sees as condemning to him.. we're not really friends.. maybe? it's kind of complicated.. though we do lepak2 together.. somehow.. sometimes.. once in a blue moon... whenever he came over.. hehe!

i don't feel butterflies in my tummy, sweaty palms, or not seeing anything else around me except him, which is relatively normal for people in love.. maybe.. i dunno. never been in love before.. just a crush.. and i'm over that feeling a loong time ago.. so don't go asking how's he? or how's ur *** and bla.. bla.. bla.. cuz it's god damn annoying! u got that? thank you~

i've had this weird feeling quite some time ago.. and it doesn't bothers me much.. until, this morning. cuz i had a dream about him... uuhh.. and it's kind of stuck to my head. it's not a more-than-normal-friends kind of dream.. i couldn't recall what's the dream about, but i'm 90% sure it's just like any-other-normal-time-when-i-see-him kind of dream.. hyuu~

i'm just gonna brush off this whole thing as some pre-adulthood notions, or maybe, since i'm stuck at home all the way 'till november and didn't really go out much and meet people, and my family and his face is all i see here.. so maybe it's something as 'spur of the moment' kind of thing.. i'm hoping it's only temporary.. cuz it's making my head spins and i feel like laughing and felt nauseous at the same time at the thought of us having a relationship! HAHA!

i never disclose this matter to anyone.. not even faiek.. really don't want to discuss this whole silly notions! so please don't ask me who is it or anything regarding this matter~ it'll go away on its own~ i hope! just wanna get this thing out from my head and poured it somewhere! i'm kind of feeling much better, now that i've let it out..

OH! here's a munchkin cat! it's to KILL for! i'll snuggle and squeeze it if i ever got my hands on it! KYAAAA!!

will hear from me soon,
hugs and kisses

Life Without Gambling is Like Sushi Without Wasabi... WHAT??!

yo people! huhuhu! haven't been posting any craps up here for a month now.. cuz there's nothing much going on in my life.. just sitting at home, play Sims 2, reading some fan fiction, catching up on long forgotten mangas, eat, sleep and get pissed off. that's just about it. and i know the title for this post is weird.. i took it from one of gintama's episodes title since it's stuck to my head right now~ LOL! i hate wasabi!

i was doing all of these routines every single day up to one point where i haven't been out of the house for 8 days and i've become so very very pessimistic.. i was pissed off most of the time, i get mad at every little mistake and i yelled at anybody who asked for my help.. and i became more sarcastic than ever.. that's the only part that remain 'till now~

but, i finally got out of the house on 29th July. went to tessa's house with faiek and lepak2 there and have dinner there... we share some secrets, got into a few complicated situations and gossips and some other random talking.

then on the 31st July, went out to midvalley with a friend. we ate like crazy that day! we ate takoyaki, 1901, baskin robbin and kenny rogers. perhaps we gained a few KGs by the end of the day.. LOL! then we watch the proposal and damn! i LOVE it! the movie is sooo cute! we laugh throughout the whole movie.. and.. i had fun. serious FUN! thanks a lot darling!

then on the 1st August, i have to go to Dewan Sivik MPPJ for my cousin's wedding. i'm not really close with my cousin's on my dad's side, so basically, i don't really give a damn about anything, but i still have to go anyway.. and hell! it's boring. thank god my mak ngah, pak ngah, mak njang and pak njang from my mom's side is there.. so, i ended up sitting with them at the VIP table together with a couples of tan sri and puan sri.. THANK GOD! i know i sound like i'm double-standart-ing my cousins, but i can't help it.. we just can't click with each other.. i'm closer to the aunts and uncles than the cousins.. very very different from my mom's side where all the cousins, cousin's husband and wife, aunts and uncles were so close to each other. yup! on my mom's side, we're one BIG HAPPY FAMILY! meow =3

the next day, i thought i could relax at home.. where i don't have to put on make up, wear my contact lens and stuffs.. but, my bro woke me up and tell me to get ready cuz we're going to KL for lunch.. this happens cuz, my mama have to go to ulu langat or something for a school camping closing ceremony, since she's the headmistress. papa has to drive her there cuz mama doesn't know the way.. and after the ceremony ended, they decided to go to KL to pick up papa and akim's baju melayu from the taylor.. and decided that we all should have lunch outside.. but then, there was this great big traffic jammed on the way to KL so we decided to have lunch at OU instead.. aannd, we ate kenny rogers.. the second time for me for the week.. uggh.. i'm kind of bored with it already.. eating it almost consecutively for 2 days~ theenn, we went home.. and the Wheel of Daily Routine spins again!

today, i installed the sims 2 along with university, nightlife, pets, seasons, bon voyage, etc.. it's almost completed.. except that i don't have apartment life and IKEA stuff.. gotta borrow it from munchkin.. nyaaa~~

and oh! yesss people! i cut my hair short! as in neck length kind of short! yup yuppie! now, my hair is back to it's original look, no more rebonding stuff whatsoever.. i'm trying to go with my natural (stubborn) wavy hair and see how it does.. so basically, my hair is kind of spiked up a bit due to the layering of the hair.. it's kind of funny, really.. to think that i haven't had this short of a hair in 10 years! can't wait for it to grow a lil' bit longer~ my head feels lighter.. and akim says that this hair style suits me the best.. hmm... dunno about that.. i still prefer my straight cut shoulder lenght straight hair.. and my hair is shorter than iman's hair! wawawa! now, all i have to do is style it up a lil'...

soooo, chiow for now.. wanna explore the newly installed sims 2.. hehehe! and i'm savouring the taste of daily routines once again before the twins came home for their holiday next week and we're gonna go out and lepak2 like crazy! hyuu~

'till next time
hugs and kisses