i feel like an idiot!
everything is not right!
what the hell am I suppose to do?
is this some kind of a payment?
is this some kind of a retribution?
for what?
for dreaming a little?
for having the nerve to follow what I really want?
is that IT??!!

it's just not FAIR!

random updates

it's almost raya!

whenever it's raya, i'll always get the feeling that one year passed by so fast! somehow, for this year, the signal for raya time came quite late.. i just realized yesterday that we're gonna balik kampung and raya sakan with family members..

this year, i only get to puase for 14 days.. ugghh.. bad period.. all thanks to my swollen ovary.. and i still haven't pick up my blood test result from the clinic. it's been there for almost a month now.. and doctor said, i have to be on hormone medication for the swollen ovary.. ugghh.. guess i need to take medicines after all.. my womb is starting to hurt every night now..

anyway, we'll be on our way to raub tomorrow morning. and, this year's raya will be the most crowded ever! i counted, and there will be 43 people in wan's house during raya, including baby hannah.. omg.. everyone will have to bring their own sleeping bed.. LOL! and today, mama baked 4 cakes! 2 fruit cakes and 2 chocolate~ can't wait for the last one to popped out of the oven so then i can eat it freshly baked and hot! XD

today has been a hectic day.. with all the baking and packing and stuff..

i'm sleepy and i smell like a sheep,
'till next time,
oyasumi~